Religious expresson, why do people get so offened?

Someone's outrage has prompted me to research this morning why so many Christians are offended by the term "Happy Holidays." Coming from nearly all Christian or Atheist family I never heard family offended by Christmas or the term "Happy Holidays" and believe this has turned into a big thing in the past decade or so, but I could be wrong, it could be as little as a few years. But why and is it right for some Christians to condemn those who use the term "Happy Holidays" and really why become so offended by something that is meant to respect everyone?

 

I want everyone to do something, I want you all to go out into the street and starting grouping people, by looks only, who is Christian, Jewish, Hindu, Muslim, Atheists, etc....But keep this in mind, each year nearly 20,000 Americans convert to Islam and not all wear head scarves and most wear western clothing. The same goes for Americans converting to Judaism, Hinduism and Buddhist. So go ahead, go to into public and start separating people by their religion or non-religion based on appearance only. Can you tell who believes or doesn't believe? Keep in mind, not all Indians are religious or practice the religion you think they do, and the same goes for any ethnicity or culture.

It's that time of year here in America and across the world to be happy and bring good cheer. However, it's not good cheer for many who are stopped from displaying their nativity scenes because it "offends" others, OOOORRRRRR Christians who become offended at the greeting "Happy Holiday" as opposed to "Merry Christmas." Neither greeting offends me personally and I agree and feel the same as the people's comments below.  The mere fact that cities all over the U.S. are stopping people from displaying their religious ornaments is disturbing because we do have the freedom of religion and religious expression. So if you're Atheist or a person of different religion and don't celebrate any holidays or the holidays of others then don't partake in the decor or festivities.  Really it's a simple, respect, live and let live. Right? Wrong, Wrong because so many people "choose" to be offended by every freaking thing that crosses their path. Instead of being offended by children being beaten and raped someone chooses to be offended about a greeting or someone else's religious decor or beliefs. Really?

 

From October to January 1st, many religious and non-religious holidays take place. Eid (Muslims), Halloween, Thanksgiving, Chanukah, Kwanza, Christmas and New Years. "Happy Holiday"s encompasses all of these holidays because this time of year is not a Christian time of year only. It is shared by many people of many religions, non-religions, ethnicities and is a very, very, diverse time of year.

 

 Anyone working with the public will most times use "Happy Holidays" because it's not ok to assume "everyone" celebrates Christmas or are Christian. I don't know about anyone else, but I "CAN'T TELL" who is Christian, Jewish, Buddhist, Muslim, Hindu or Atheist from the next. So why am I going to automatically wish anyone Merry Christmas during this time of year when this time of year holds so many religious holidays and traditions or so many people? Why are people rude to me and why am I yelled at and condemned for using the term Happy Holidays? I have used that term since I was young because I grasped the idea and knowledge that we are a mixed nation of people and this has never been an "ALL" Christian nation nor will it ever be. I understood the history of how Christianity came to this country and the history of this nation period.

 

If you know someone personally then of course wish them Merry Christmas or Happy Chanukah, or Happy Eid, or Happy Kwanza, or Happy whatever. But to assume everyone celebrates Christmas and is obligated to wish everyone "Merry Christmas" and to become offended when someone says "Happy Holiday" is not appropriate or fair either.  In saying that respect for everyone is a must. On the day of Christmas I will wish people that I personally know "Merry Christmas" but I will not be bullied into saying Merry anything because it offends that person or religion. People in this world become to offended by others for no good reason. Can one Christian, Muslim, Jewish or Atheist speak for "ALL"? NO. Do all Christians, or Atheists, or Muslims, or Jewish all think the same way? NO.  I don't think or practice like ALL other Muslims because my culture and experiences are different so I don't speak for ALL Muslims as no Christian can speak for ALL Christians.

So in all this all I can do is give my belief and what I have found. All I know is people become offended over some stupid stuff when I can think of more important and egregious issues to be offended by like children being raped or beaten or starved.  

*By the way, if you put up a Christmas tree that is not a part of Christmas, nor is gifts from Santa.*

I have looked online for an answer from others and this is what I have found.

 "People take this whole thing way too seriously.. If a Jewish person said happy Chanukah to me I wouldn't care even if i wasn't Jewish. But some people do get offended, so why not save the embarrassment but saying happy holidays? Then Christians get offended because of their pride in their holiday. It honestly doesn't bother me either way.. People take this whole religion thing way too seriously."

"It bothers some because they feel this is a "Christian" nation and their rights to their religion are being eroded away.

Happy holidays, is a neutralized version of wishing everyone regardless of their religion to have a happy religious holiday. People forget that there are others religions that have special occasions around Christmas. Jews, Muslims, other religions, and secular minded people enjoy Christmas, although it doesn't directly apply to them. By saying, "Happy Holidays," we include others, rather than be snobbish or arrogant, implying one group of people are better than other groups, or like exclusive country clubs, whereby if you don't have money, fame or power, you can't come in. If you're not a "Christian," you're not welcome here. Bahooey to that!" (http://www.ask.com/answers/462932721/why-do-some-people-get-offended-by-the-term-happy-holidays)

 "I mean there ARE other holidays besides Christmas around this time of year, and unless I know better I'm not going to just assume that you celebrate Christmas. If I know that you're a Christian then I'll gladly say "Merry Christmas" to you. No big deal. I'm not generalizing all Christians. I'm just talking about the few who act like this. " (http://www.sodahead.com/living/why-do-some-christians-get-so-offended-when-someone-says-happy-holidays-as-opposed-to-merry-chris/question-3381415/?link=ibaf&q=&esrc=s)

Here is a great article addressing this very thing from "Parent Magazine."

(http://www.todaysparent.com/blogs/tracys-mama-memoirs/are-you-offended-by-happy-holidays/)

"I can’t quite wrap my mind around what those who celebrate Christmas feel they lose by saying “happy holidays” in cases when they’re not sure what the other person celebrates. Do they really not get their fill of Christmas — between the parades and the Santa in every mall, the buildings decked out in red and green, the TV shows and movies, and the myriad events going on everywhere all December long — that it pains them to convey a message not wrapped in the C-word? Why is it so offensive? How does it snatch away their joy or diminish their celebration?

I can’t bear discrimination of any kind, and it’s one thing to say “I’m going to say Merry Christmas because that’s what I celebrate” and a whole other thing to say “How dare they come to our country and tell us we can’t say Christmas anymore?” That, to me, is appalling. First of all, it’s not just people who have recently arrived in Canada who don’t celebrate Christmas. You must know this. Secondly, from what I’ve seen, it’s never this “them” who are trying to enforce a more inclusive celebration. It’s us. Well, some of us — the ones who care about the feelings of our friends, our colleagues, our kids’ friends and families, and strangers on the street, who have every right to celebrate their customs. They have no interest in abolishing ours. They just want to celebrate something that matters to them, too. There’s no “us and them” in any of this, unless we manufacture it."

 

At the end of the day, people should spend their time being less offended by others and celebrating their holidays as they do. Live and let live. Respect, peace and love for others, it goes a long way.

My lovely life at work with customer interactions

Wish I had and could wear a hidden camera with audio so people (and my work) could see and hear what I do as a Muslimah from people every day. Maybe its because so many more people are wonderful and don't care that I am Muslim and know the difference between evil radical Muslims and good peaceful Muslims, or maybe its because so many people just accept that we are all different and we all follow our own path to God OR that we are all related and linked together in this universe some how, at some time, at some moment and we're to treat each other with love and respect is what makes those who are nasty and mean stick out like soar thumbs being slammed in a car door over and over and over again.

Two days ago a Christian man (older man, his tie with a cross and Jesus on it gave him away along with his necklace with the cross and Jesus) slapped his receipt in my hand and said "take it" in a hostile voice then walked off without his receipt. He has done it before but didn't do it when I went without my scarf. I asked several other people if he does that to them and they said no he is nice to them. That same day a younger guy (30's ish) starred me down with the complete evil hairy eyeball. If looks could kill I'd be 6ft. under right now. Totally made it clear that he would have gutted me like a fish if he could. That type of behavior from others makes it a scary place live for Muslims in this country. Truly it does.


We are all different, isn't that what's beautiful with this world?

It has been a while but I am back for now.

Wow it has been such a long time since I have posted. My last computer crashed and my friend has allowed me to borrow theirs for a while. Alhamdulillah!


So what has happened since January in my lovely little life. Lots. I moved into my own place finally and I am still working at Costco. My experiences as a hijabi have been positive thus far with only a few blatant verbal attacks.

I believe I have already blogged about the very first verbal interaction at work with a customer who basically called me a rag head when he and his family walked to the door. His exact words were "I wish I could wear a big pink towel on my head like you." That was like a fatal stab to my jugular. I replied, "its not a towel its my scarf" turned away and helped the next customers. He has been to the store since but has not said a word to me.

I find some (and I say some because its never a representative of all) elderly people are set to far back in their beliefs and knowledge that they don't know how to change. The last to negative verbal encounters happened at my work by two elderly customers. The first happened on Monday, May 29, 2013 at 1055a.m. Yes I remember because one doesn't forget the bigotry directed at them personally. A little old lady approached the door, I checked her receipt and gave it back telling her to have a nice day. She just stared in bewilderment for a few short moments then said, "oh dear, your wearing a scarf your a terrorist." Now, I'm always stunned at peoples blatant disregard for courtesy and respect but at her age I don't think she even cares nor thought of what she was truly saying and how it would affect me. I replied, "no mam, I am not a terrorist." The elderly red headed woman just shook her head staring dumbfounded. I wanted to lash out and tell her listen lady.....and ramble on about how all Muslims are not terrorists and she should research domestic terrorism in the United States and what does she think about Timothy McVeigh, the Uni-bomber and a whole list of violent Americans who have committed heinous vile violent acts against America and their own people. But I did not, I work for a company that I love and represented so I pulled up my professional big girl panties and told her to have a nice day after I said I was not a terrorist. I let it sink in for a moment and knew that her words still stung like a barbed jagged thorn being plunged into my heart. I barely made it to the managers office holding it together but I did long enough to reach her and tell her what was said. Then I cried as I told her and quite frankly I don't know how she comprehended what I said. However, with an apology and a hug (as this particular manager is very perceptive and loving to our feelings) she empathized with me.

This last incident happened on Sunday the 21st of July. An elderly man, again in his late 80's to mid 90's, with a German accent walked up to me and put his face very close to mine and chuckled as he said *in his thick German accent* "Are you a terrorist?" I looked up and saw a younger woman who looked to be his daughter or granddaughter grimace and mouthed "I am sooooo sorry." I looked at the old man, smiled and replied, "no sir, I am no terrorist." He walked away chuckling. I am not sure if he was joking or got a kick out of being an asshole. Never-the-less, I have started to become thick skinned to such blatant bigotry and realize they know nothing more and even if I attempted to educate them they wouldn't care. That is between them and God. This time I did not go to a manager, nor did I cry. I laughed it off. It felt good to laugh it off and not to take their ignorance or hatred personally.

At the end of the day I am a Costco employee and I represent them when I work and interact with customers and it is essential to remain calm, respectful and professional with all customers and co-workers at all times and when faced with adversity.


That's enough for now because I must go. I will be back soon to post more of my experiences, thoughts and research later this week. Work is calling. :)

Hijab is not just another pretty scarf!

Is dressing modestly a new phenomenon to this world and how long has the concept of modesty been around?  Is dressing modestly only an Islamic "thing" or is it a woman's "thing" across this great big blue globe? Are we more alike than different? What religions practice modesty now and have practiced modesty throughout history?

In my research I have found there are many religions out here and just as many versions of dressing modestly.

Lets look at a few religions starting with Christianity.



Before I converted to Islam I was Christian, however, I did not practice modesty at all! The Bible does teach modesty and many Christian women practice modestly every day.

“In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array; But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works.” (I Timothy 2:9-10)

“The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman’s garment: for all that do so are an abomination unto the LORD thy God.” (Deuteronomy 22:5)

In the Bible is says that women and men should not wear the clothes of one another. Women wear pants all the time and it has become a common place in society, however, the bible clearly states: “The woman shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on a woman’s garment: for all that do so are an abomination unto the LORD thy God.” (Deuteronomy 22:5)

Now one can always argue as most people do that these passages are from the Old Testament, however, when the Bible is studied it is studied as a whole and lessons are to be learned from all chapters of the bible. Gods word is Gods word right?

Of course times have changed since the bible was written, however, Gods words haven't changed. Different denominations of Christians practice modesty in today's times. So many different denominations of Christianity to look at for practices of modesty.  http://christiansdressingmodestly.com/ 

Amish:

I have found Amish women and men dress more modestly and plainly than many of those who practice Islam. In saying that, everyone has their own vision on what is modest and what is beauty.

Why do the Amish dress modestly and plainly? Several answers exist for this question. The answer is not only because of scripture in the bible as mentioned above but they wear it for "simplicity and practicality" as well. (http://amishamerica.com/why-do-the-amish-wear-plain-clothing/)

Mainstream western culture is very fixed on looks, style and materialistic things and many wouldn't be caught dead in the drab, oversized clothing, however, the mainstream western culture accepts the Amish and their modest dress along with Mennonites and Mormons.




Mennonites:

Mennonites dress very similarly to the Amish. Both Mennonites and the Amish are from a "Protestant" background called "Anabaptist's" that came into existence from around the "16th century." Just as Muslims believe in living out their daily lives as the Qur'an says, so do Mennonites and the Amish and many Christians. The Amish separated from the Mennonites during the late 1600's because they believed they should live separate from the rest of society and the world living more in line to what the bible says. "Mennonites believe in simple living, but express that simplicity in a spirit of stewardship and awareness of the needs of others rather than completely separating from society as the Amish continue to do." (http://www.thirdway.com/menno/FAQ.asp?F_ID=3)

Mormons:

Not all Mormons practice modesty as this particular denomination, nonetheless, many Mormons do practice modesty to some extent. The Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints does practice such modesty as it does practice polygamy as well. Some of you may remember one such group of Mormons as the subject of a federal raid back in 2008 when it removed over four hundred children after allegations of young girls (underage) being married off to older men. The group denies allegations, however, it is not their first interaction with authorities in regards to child marriages. Back on "July 26, 1953, raid in Colorado City, Ariz., involved more than 300 women and children. It backfired on then-governor Howard Pyle when pictures showed weeping children being torn from frantic mothers. Most of the children and women returned to their homes within months." (http://usatoday30.usatoday.com/news/nation/2008-04-07-polygamy_n.htm)

Their leader, Warren Jeffs was convicted in 2008 on sexual assault and aggravated sexual assault on children in relations to the raid of the FDLS (Fundamentalist Church of the Latter Day Saints) compound in Texas where the over four hundred young children were taken into protective custody.

Greek Orthodox:

The Greek Orthodox church dates back to Ancient Christianity and as shown here Greek Orthodox Nuns where hijab to this day.

"But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head. (I Corinthians 11:5)."

Even though many Greek Orthodox women in the United States stopped wearing the veil for various reasons (many due to vanity) there are many across the world that still hold to the religion and what God asks of them in the Bible.

Catholic:

Catholic women were always required to cover their heads with a veil before entering church up until the mid 70's when it was decided wearing a veil inside the church was no longer a requirement. Modestly among Catholic women had always been taught, however, with each generation came a rebellion and defiance against the teachings. After all if you go to church on Sunday, go to confession and knock out a few Hail Marys all is forgiven right?

Baptists:

Perhaps the most famous Baptists in America and on reality t.v. are the Dugger family of "19 and Counting." A lovely family with very well behaved children that have gained the respect and love of America.

Some Baptist denominations encourage modest dressing as well. Commonly  Baptist women wear a long skirt or floor length dress and shirts with long or short sleeves that show no cleavage and very little make-up if any at all.

Jewish Orthodox:

Modesty and humility the theme thus far with the religions that we have seen and Jewish Orthodox does not differ from them in this aspect. The term "tzniut" refers to "modesty and/or privacy and is practiced among Orthodox and many conservatives in Judaism. It not only relates to "modesty and/or privacy" but the interactions with the opposite sex as well.

In certain Jewish communities such as the "Haredi" men wear long trousers, shirts, coats and beards topped off with a hat and the women wear skirts below the knees, sleeves that cover past their elbows and crew neck collars that are not plunging and cover up to the neck. Many women cover from neck to feet only showing their head and hands and you won't catch them in slacks or jeans.

Hinduism:

"Rig Veda Bk 8 Hym 33 V 19
Modesty of a Women: Hinduism Cast down thine eyes and look not up. More closely set thy feet. Let not the garments reveil what the viel conciels , for thou, Brahma hast made you a dame(women)."

"Vishnu Sutra Ch 25 V 9-10
Not to decorate herself with ornaments (or to partake of amusements) while her husband is absent from home; 10. Not to resort to the houses of strangers (during the absence of her husband"

Hindu women also cover their hair and partial face with their sari or dupatta when they are around other men that are of no relation to them.




Islam:

Surely modesty is subjective as is the style of modesty right? In Islam women cover themselves selves as well, however, we see they do so with much vibrancy and style. Is modesty being covered from head to toe or about the color of ones clothes? Is it wearing drab clothing? Who is to judge but God right?

For myself dressing modest is not showing anything but my hands, face and feet and wearing non-form fitting clothing. The picture above and to the left shows a few of the many different styles of hijab typical of Middle Eastern countries and western culture.

Is hijab about just another pretty scarf and sparkles? Absolutely not! We must not mistake personality and colorful clothing for modesty and hijab. Hijab like other religious coverings is about attitude, kindness, charity, behavior, personality and so on. As my friend Hina stated in her post the Holy Qur'an states:

“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and guard their modesty. That is pure purer for them. Lo! Allah is aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and guard their modesty, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornments save to their own husband, or father, or husbands father, or their sons, or their husbands sons or their brothers, or their brothers sons, or sisters sons, or their women, or their servants, or male attendants who lack vigor, or children who know not of women’s nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn onto Allah together, O believers, in order that you may succeed.” (24, 30-31)


A pretty scarf is a pretty scarf but what lays beneath is so much more....welcome to the world of hijab where ones personality and character are of the utmost importance. How a hijabi treats another person is more important than the color or design of a scarf and that includes the treatment of non-Muslims as well.

From Hindu to Jewish and Greek Orthodox to Islam to Christianity to most every religion dressing modestly is looked upon favorably, however, as my friend Hina also pointed out "many in the west have strayed away from modesty yet many still practice it within certain religious denominations."

Many people in the west view hijab as oppressive, however, it is the farthest thing from the truth. Many people confuse culture and talibanish laws with the religion of Islam thus is where confusion, misinformation, stereotypes and preconceived notions stem.

Life is about coming together and building bridges on commonality and working together to understand and to respect one another's beliefs even though they are not our own and that includes that of an Atheists non-beliefs. Take away politics and media and people do wonderful all by themselves. Religions and people have more in common than just modesty and I will cover that in future posts.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today an elderly man came into Costco and as he entered the building he stopped and asked me "so what's all this on your head, what it supposed to be?" I replied "this is a hijab." the elderly man then scrunched his face up and in a scruffy voice he replied " this has some religious condemnation to it then!" I replied "yes sir it does." the old man then replied with a scowl on his face " well then that's your problem, that's just your problem."

LOL I wasn't even shocked and told him "sir you have a wonderful shopping experience here at Costco today" with a huge smile on my face. *sigh* sometimes you just have to find the humor in other peoples intolerence.

I know some people are not interested in these types of updates on my interactions with the public. However it's only one part of my big journey. Nonetheless, it's an important part because this is what I was doing as a social experiment prior to converting to Islam and what I continue to do as a Muslim. Documenting the reactions and interactions with people in society regarding Muslims and Islam, which includes my family as well, is an interesting part of my journey. I am learning a lot about people and myself.

Hijab: Freedom or Oppression

In the west there are so many misconceptions about Muslims especially about Muslim

women and their way of dressing. The west views it as a mode of oppression, however, for  

 Muslims its modesty and freedom.

Actually, Hijab is an expression of modesty and freedom from the evil eyes of the opposite

gender.  As we know, in the modern world women have become the object of superficial beauty,

materialism, and sexism. Men treat women as a sex object. Men judge them based

upon their color, curves, and curls rather than their abilities, moral character, intellect,

etc. That results in low self-esteem and low self-worth. Every girl is trying to look as

beautiful as models and actresses (although they know that it’s all fake beauty that is a

result of computer editing and plastic surgeries) but still they are being controlled by the

media on what to wear and how to look (causing self-esteem problems). They have

been enslaved by the media and this is real oppression!!

On the other hand, Hijab gives freedom to woman by setting her free from the slavery of the

media. It provides woman with an opportunity to be judged by her intellect, moral

character and capabilities rather than superficial beauty and materialism. Hijab blesses

women with respect and dignity and provides freedom from evil eyes of the opposite

gender.

When a nun decides to commit to church and covers her head, she sacrifices her life

for the church, she cannot get married (though its nowhere in bible), she can’t have

children and grandchildren, she cannot enjoy the love and tranquility of a spouse ( itʼs

one of the basic needs of all living beings). This is oppression!!

While, when a Muslim woman decides to wear hijab, she can lead a normal life without

any oppression. So, the conclusion is that Hijab is definitely freedom not oppression!!

 

~By Hina Nadar~

What is hijab?

A Muslim woman’s modest way of dressing is called “Hijab”, it is an expression of

modesty. It not only includes covering head but also dressing modestly overall (i.e.

wearing loose clothing, not showing skin, not getting extra attention of the opposite gender or lowering gaze and guarding modesty). Hijab is not only for body (physical), but it also includes actions and behaviors. 

As it is in Holy Quran! “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and guard their modesty. That is pure purer for them. Lo! Allah is aware of what they do. And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and guard their modesty, and to display of their adornment only that which is apparent, draw their veils over their bosoms, and not to reveal their adornments save to their own husband, or father, or husbands father, or their sons, or their husbands sons or their brothers, or their brothers sons, or sisters sons, or their women, or their servants, or male attendants who lack vigor, or children who know not of women’s nakedness. And let them not stamp their feet so as to reveal what they hide of their adornment. And turn onto Allah together, O believers, in order that you may succeed.” (24, 30-31)

Hijab is an obligation as it was considered obligatory in other religions about a century ago (now modernism has invaded modesty). Muslim women tend to dress modestly as Virgin Mary (Peace be upon her) did, as nuns do today. Some Christians such as Amish women also cover their head, some

Jewish sects also require women to cover their head. Hinduism and Sikhism also have a tradition of head covering. In short, head covering or dressing modestly is nothing new but it has been a part of almost every faith or religion but modernism replaced it with time!!

~By Hina Nadar~

As a convert I am in a world between to others.

As a convert I am in a world between two others; Christianity and Islam. I am blessed to be apart of both worlds since my whole family is Christian and my new family is Muslim. I have spoke before of my love for Christianity as it is the foundation that moved me to Islam.

As a convert I am also subjected to the hate and extremism of both sides. A hate that controls people and drives them to say and do mean and evil things. As a convert I receive the type of messages I have copy and pasted below every once and a while from both sides of the fence.

Racism, bigotry, intolerance and pure hate are beliefs and behaviors that destroy a person and the people around them or the subject of their hate. I have always said intolerance is always offensive no matter who it comes from.

Bigotry: "1. stubborn and complete intolerance of any creed, belief, or opinion that differs from one's own." (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/bigotry)

Racism: "1. a belief or doctrine that inherent differences among the various human races determine cultural or individual achievement, usually involving the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to rule others.

2. a policy, system of government, etc., based upon or fostering such a doctrine; discrimination.

3. hatred or intolerance of another race or other races." (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/racism)

Intolerance: "1. lack of toleration; unwillingness or refusal to tolerate or respect contrary opinions or beliefs, persons of different races or backgrounds, etc." (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/intolerance)

Hate: "dislike intensely or passionately; feel extreme aversion for or extreme hostility toward; detest: to hate the enemy; to hate bigotry."(http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/hate)

Anger: A strong feeling of displeasure or hostility. (http://www.thefreedictionary.com/anger)

Here are two of the latest inboxes I have received by two people. One is Christian and one is Muslim.

"Tracey Demchyna
OK nutball, I've tried to block you several times, and yet you post your B S on my timeline.... My GOD is CHRIST soooo GO TFA.. Otherwise I will continue to report you as spam. SHAME ON GAZA.. PRAISE ISRAEL"

"Sam Mas

ur country is a terrorist nation killing innocent muslims and ur also one of them coz ur defending and supporting them.
bye bye terrorist.
may Allah help open ur eyes and indeed AMERICA IS THE WORLD'S BIGGEST TERRORIST."

 

 

When you read the above messages you will find one or more of the five subjects listed above as well (racism, bigotry, hate, intolerance, anger)  above. Lots and lots of anger is apparent.

When this comes from people of a religious faith it is more disturbing to me because I know that if any religion is practiced correctly a person is loving and peaceful and respectful of other religions. However, it is very off putting and people like the two above can push people away from a religion. The first, "Tracey," also made negative, hostile comments on someone elses page in regards to his interracial marriage to his wife. The second person "Sam" is an angry extremist Muslim who hates America and calls us terrorists. I have never been mean to him but pointed out I am a proud American and what he said is offensive and untrue. I "unfriended" Sam due to his behavior and his extremism and that is when he became irate and left me a nasty message calling me a "terrorist" then he (laughing my ass off) blocked me.

They're not the first people I have come across of practicing faiths that have harassed me or left me nasty messages nor do I suppose they are the last. If you really want a taste of the mean and nasty bigots, racists and religious extremists go to Youtube, you will not be disappointed if you are looking for those types of people.

I usually brush it off and let it go when people contact me with such bull crap. I find it humorous and sad all at the same time. Humorous because I laugh at the patheticness of it all (which I learned to do after leaving my last ex and after the light just popped on one day, I thought "ohh ohh it was him not me" *laughing*) and sad that people allow such hate to tunnel vision and control them.


I can make my own drama in life I don't need others to add drama and chaos. I have found making positive and good choices in life lessens drama and chaos.


I have said it before and will say it again, I rarely ever conform to what others believe I should say and do. I rarely follow the popular path or the path of most people. If I want to get a tattoo I will get a tattoo. If I want to marry a non-Muslim I will marry a non-Muslim. If I want to dance and sing I will do it and if I want to wear jewelry on my hijab I will. I am proud to be American and I love my country and if another Muslim doesn't like it to frick frackin bad, I don't give a rats butt. I am proud to be Muslimah and will shout it from the mountain tops, if I want to post or talk about my religion I will! If I want to move to an Islamic country I will (definitely no plans of that but just an example), if I want have all Muslim friends I will (I have both Muslim and non-Muslim and I am proud), if I want to take a stance against injustices (as I often do) I will, if I want to marry a Muslim and have a Muslim wedding I will and if Christians don't like it (family or not) to frick frackin bad! I don't give a rats butt!!! What is between God and I is between God and I. Only God knows my intentions. I do not need baby sitters. Ok, enough of my soap box rant.


People who are so consumed with hate will most likely and eventually lash out at others who are the subject of their hate and I've apparently been the subject of their hate and lashings out. I say it once again, I have said it before and I will say it again, if people don't like it feel free to hit "unfriend" or let me be! Truly it makes no difference to me I have learned I can not consume other peoples anger or worry whether they love me or accept me or not. Of course rejection will always sting but it must be put in perspective. I have had family delete me or hardly talk to me or not talk to me at all or like my step father always have something condescending to say (he doesn't have another time to say something without me saying something back he will get a long awaited cussing out) and it really doesn't hurt me anymore to let them go.

In the end, people will be who they are and we can't let their negativity consume us.



 

Peace is everyones responsibility!!!!

The only way for peace to happen in this world is if we stop pointing fingers, hate and making anti-anything accusations and.....wait for it.....I know this is going to be shocking for many......behave peacefully ourselves and stop throwing fuel on the fire spreading the hate. Those who point fingers (calling it "the truth") and return hateful commentary are no better than those who are doing the hating.

So let’s promote peace for all (my inner hippie is coming out lol must have got that from my NON-MUSLIM parents) no matter who they are or where they come from. We should pray for everyone no matter what faith or non-faith they hold or what country they are from. We should not separate ourselves from others because when we do we're building a wall and flaming the fire.

A bully is a bully is a bully and hate is hate is hate no matter how you try to make it smell good, pretty it up or justify it. You can't spread hate about someone or a country then turn around and call it loyalty to a religion. That IS STILL hate NOT the "truth." No better than Israel bombing Palestine and calling it self-defense. It is the same thing. Hate is hate is hate.

NO MORE BULLYING OR HATE FROM ANYONE.

That is my commentary for the day.

The end.

You may resume to your regular programing!

My journey to Islam

When did I start my journey to Islam and why did I become Muslim? The reply to this question doesn't come with one answer.

There are many things in life that inspire us and make us emotional whether it is happy, sad or elated, angry, frustrated, motivated, loved etc....

For me nothing can make me swoon and become so emotional as my son makes me feel. My son is the very air I breath. He is an adult now but nonetheless he is my child and that bond will always be strong and unbreakable. One other thing that brings me such joy and happiness is Islam. I still struggle with the teachings at times but I know I have people to turn to when I need answers or explanations to the things I do not know or understand.

No other religion has affected me nor has any other religion put tears in my eyes and joy in my heart as Islam has. It is such a misunderstood religion and I wish people could see what I saw in it before my conversion and now after. I knew from a very young age I was drawn to women who wore a veil (hijab) but didn't know why. It was as if I was destined to find Islam and the second I put a scarf on I knew it would never come off. 

 

I truly respect Christianity as it is the very foundation of my religious experience, it was with Christian teachings that I was raised. However, as I have mentioned before in another post, I never felt the same connection with Christianity as I do with Islam. I never understood the trinity regardless of how many times I heard the story. I didn't know where I belonged in life. When I was young I didn't know Islam existed but I never lost faith that there was a higher power at work, a God, something, then for a long time I just gave up and thought Christianity was it and maybe only being spiritual was the other option. My parents nor family ever taught me about Islam nor did the churches we ever attended. Not that I recall anyway. The only teaching we were subjected to other than Christianity was when my Confirmation class leaders at the Lutheran church took us to a Synagogue to witness a Bar Mitzvah. That was it. I was taught that Christianity was the only way to get into heaven and Jesus was the son the father and the holy ghost. None of which ever in my life made sense but never to be questioned. In saying that, Christianity is a wonderful religion and I was blessed to have such a wonderful religious foundation that makes Islam that much more amazing to me.

When I was young I remember being fascinated with belly dancers, movies with scenes from the Middle East, in books and even seeing pictures of early Christians following Jesus who wore hijab. I was mesmerized and knew it was a good thing. I was never taught that is was bad either. When I was in the 6th grade we studied Greek and Egyptian Mythology. I love, love, loved learning about Egyptian pharaohs and queens and Greek Gods and Goddess. I felt so connected to the teachings of those times, the people and the countries. I still do. :) But alas, I still didn't know why at such a young age.

What was marriage to a man who was born Muslim like? Even though I had been married to a Muslim for many years we didn't talk about Islam nor did he teach me anything. He had expressed that he didn't practice Islam nor had he ever stepped foot in a Mosque. However, he was raised in an Islamic run country and culture. All I knew is that he was Muslim and that meant the Muslims portrayed by the media and hate mongers were not who my ex-husband and his family were. They were and still are wonderful people. I knew enough (and I still do) to be able to tell the difference between good and bad. I knew it was a familiar feeling living inside a middle-eastern home and very comforting to me.

It wasn't until I became a police officer and worked in a city just miles away from the largest Middle Eastern community in the United States did I become more aware of Islam and hijabi's. We all remember where we were when 9/11 happened and me included. I sat in the resting area of the women's locker room at the gym I belonged to and by the time I made it home both towers were coming down and Islamic terrorists had taken credit. Islam had come to the forefront of everyones attention and thus came all the hate, stereotypes, misinformation's and preconceived notions. To be honest that included myself as well. I have to admit I didn't understand modesty or Islam and was under the impression it was oppressive. I too received my Islamic and Muslim education via other people and the media. When 9/11 came to pass my perceptions of modesty, hijabi's and Islam were some how validated. Had I ever spoke to a Muslim about Islam, hijab or modesty? NO! Had I ever asked a Muslim questions? NO! My interactions with Muslims as a police officer were not positive, however, my interactions with most citizens were not positive but those few interactions further help shape my perception. I still did not take the initiative to ask questions as most people do not. In all fairness, my perception of all people while I was an officer was negative and skewed. It wasn't until I left police work that I began to repair my twisted view of the public and realized the majority of people are wonderful and not everyone was an asshole, criminal or suspect.

Once I left police work I was able to open my self up to people and living with my ex-boyfriend in west Detroit on the border of Dearborn enabled me to interact with many Muslims and I felt at home in a Middle Eastern community once again and the familiarity was very comforting. I remember doing my laundry at our local laundromat which was owned by Muslims. True to form my ex expected his clothing washed regardless of my health status so I sat in the laundromat with a terrible sinus infection which came with a fever and a migraine. The young Muslim man who was working behind the counter kept looking at me as he talked on the phone and then came over with several cold wet clothes and wrapped them around my neck and forehead. He said "why are you working when you are so sick?" My reply, "someone has to do it." I thought, "omg how very sweet" and as long as it took me to do my laundry he made sure the clothes stayed cold. I was reminded once again in life Muslims were not all what the media portrayed them to be and many people formed their opinions and beliefs off of misinformation and preconceived notions.

Now, lets discuss modesty because I was once the complete opposite of modest *snort/giggle*. I will not post the pictures but trust when I say everything was tight and the revealing of bare skin all over was a norm. For me, modesty is such a blessing and a wonderful comfort. First, of course because Allah asks me to cover and second because I feel much more beautiful and amazing!!!! People notice me for me, not for what I am *hehem/clears throat* displaying. For myself, (and I can only speak for me) that is such an extraordinary feeling. For people to be focused on me and not my boobs or my butt and thighs is a good thing. Their first impression is of just me.

Some people will automatically believe and say that hijabi's are oppressed women being forced to cover themselves and men treat them like possessions and beat them. I personally would have never converted to a religion that would oppress me, hold me back or be mistreated. I don't feel oppressed and at the end of the day it is my choice to cover. I do so because God has asked me to and because I have never felt more free in my life than I do now.

Lets look at the definition of modesty: (mod-es-ty) "Reserve or propriety in speech, dress or behavior."  (http://www.thefreedictionary.com/modesty) 

I like the above definition because it entails more than just "dress" because hijab is more than just about covering your body, its about how we project ourselves with character, the way we act/"behavior" and the way we talk to other people/"speech." Hijab and modesty is about all of those things. It is who we are.

Finally, in the past few years after I left my last boyfriend I became friends with a young lady who also converted. If I ever had questions she would answer them and she has always been so sweet and kind. I purchased a Qur'an in late 2010 or early 2011 and started reading it and it was last year that decided I needed to walk in the shoes of Muslim women, I needed to wear hijab. I decided that in January and didn't put on a scarf until March 18th. (yes I remember the exact date.) I knew I never wanted to take it off but alas, I worked security and didn't know if they would allow it. So every day I would wear the hijab to and from work and only took it off while I worked during the day. lol I worked security standing in a bank. It also took me a while to wear it to school. I started off slowly then it became an everyday thing and everywhere. I became more aware of my surroundings and peoples reactions to me. My senses were very heightened and I noticed most everything for a long time. The stares the whispers the facial expressions.....everything. Now I am oblivious to it and could care less. I still notice the outward and blatant mean looks, stares and actions from people but have found it easier and easier to just ignore them. My son has a hard time ignoring it and it irritates him, however, I tell him to ignore it because people are mostly curious and once I speak to them they will loosen up. (usually) I tell my son it is always good to remain calm, polite and very nice. People respond better to that behavior better and it leaves a lasting impression on them to what the majority of Muslims are like and supposed to be like.

My first visit with my friend who has a young 6 year old son and who is one of "thee" smartest young boys I have met was a memorable visit. Such a joyful and kind boy to be around. The visit was made more memorable when his mother asked him if he wanted to recite Ayat ul Kursi to me. I believe he was a bit shy so he whispered the words in Arabic in my ear.....

"Ayat ul Kursi

ALLAAHO LAA ELAAHA ILLAA HOWA, AL-HAYYUL QAYYOOMO, LAA TAAKHOZOHU SENATUWN WALAA NAWMUN,
LAHU MAA FIS SAMAAWAATE WA MAA FIL ARZE, MAN ZAL LAZE YASH-FA-O' I'NDAHU ILLAA BE-IZNEHI, YA'LAMO MAA BAYNA AYDEEHIM WA MAA KHALFAHUM, WA LAA YOHEETOONA BE SHAYIM MIN I'LMEHI ILLAA BEMAA SHAAA-A, WASE-A' KURSIYYOHUS SAMAAWAATE WAL ARZA, WA LAA YA-OODOHU HIFZOHOMAA, WA HOWAL A'LIYYUL A'ZEEM."

"Surah Al-Baqara
Allah! There is no God save Him, the Alive, the Eternal. Neither slumber nor sleep overtaketh Him. Unto Him belongeth whatsoever is in the heavens and whatsoever is in the earth. Who is he that intercedeth with Him save by His leave? He knoweth that which is in front of them and that which is behind them, while they encompass nothing of His knowledge save what He will. His throne includeth the heavens and the earth, and He is never weary of preserving them. He is the Sublime, the Tremendous. (255)"  (http://www.duas.org/Misc/aayat_alkursi.html#Trans)

There is NOTHING and I mean there is NOTHING more sweet then a 6 year old reciting such a beautiful scripture in your ear.....again tears welling up. If you have never heard such a beautiful thing you have truly missing out. Just reading this scripture wells up such emotion in me and when I combine it with the memory of my first visit it makes it that much more sweet.

In addition, as I wore hijab everyday I started to listen to more Islamic teachings on Youtube by people like Yusuf Estes and the Youtube channel Islam on Demand. I started asking more questions and the more I asked the more learned and loved. Then came the day, I knew (eyes welling up with tears and I haven't even put them into words on this post yet) I knew it was time to take my Shahadah. I was speaking to my friend on the phone knowing I wanted to take my shahadah as soon as possible and didn't want to wait another moment, I just didn't know how or where which is why I called her. It was then she told me they (she and her husband could do it and yes I am now in tears and have a running nose because I am overwhelmed with such emotion) could do it in their home. I was already walking out the door dressed to drive over an hour away for my shahadah. I didn't tell anyone in my house, I just left. My friends husband (a wonderful Egyptian man) had left for his job and turned around to give me my shahada. Once they gave me a lesson on the 5 pillars of Islam and explained everything in detail so I would understand, we washed and prayed then I repeated the words with so much emotion that it was more of a whisper fighting to sound coherent and audible as tears streamed down my face and as my emotions overwhelmed me.

"ASH-HADU ANLA ELAHA ILLA-ALLAH WA ASH-HADU ANNA MOHAMMADAN RASUL-ALLAH".

In English: "I bear witness that there is no deity (none truly to be worshipped) but, Allah, and I bear witness that Mohammad is the messenger of Allah."

My friend never left my side once, she sat by my side for the lesson, prayed by my side and sat again by my side for my shahadah never leaving me, she is truly my sister and I am so thankful for her.

Never had Christianity made me so emotional, never had I felt so close to any religion as I had to Islam and to this day I can't think of that very moment without being brought to tears. All in all I have learned over the years you will find good and bad comes in all shapes and forms and from every race, religion, non-religion and ethnicity. I have learned that we're the example we set for all human beings and for the Muslim community.

So again, I ask, when did I start my journey to Islam? My answer is...........My whole life has been my journey and Islam has always been my destiny. I am Muslimah and I am proud!

Religious Law Chafes Christians and Muslims Alike | Womens eNews

Religious Law Chafes Christians and Muslims Alike | Womens eNews

Muslim American Women Tell Their Own Love Stories | Womens eNews

Muslim American Women Tell Their Own Love Stories | Womens eNews

My thoughts this month

Yesterday a man named Mohamed inboxed me on my facebook page and told me I was a good Muslim and thanked me for what I was doing. It came from a response I posted to OnIslam English ( This is the link to my comments Mohamed was inboxing me about: https://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?fbid=531864653510253&set=a.160162380680484.35666.115203078509748&type=1&theater )

I feel that as a convert I have a different perspective on life and religions, as an American I have a different perspective on the issues within these religions. I am not a processional scholar nor do I know it all or do I think I am superior or America is superior to anyone or any country. What I do see from many Muslims is a contradiction of what they say their faith says and how they behave and what they say, especially about America and Americans. I see a lot of anti-American statements and feelings in the Muslim world from other countries pointing fingers and blaming America.

The comments you read in the link above are indicative of the ones I see a lot from Muslims from other countries and maybe some here in the U.S. I have seen other Muslims comment saying American Muslims are not real Muslims. These are the same comments I've heard from Christians about other Christians. Muslims pointing fingers at Christians, Christians pointing fingers at Muslims. Americans pointing fingers at the Middle East and Asia and the Middle East and Asia pointing fingers at America.

Am I the only one who thinks this is all ludicris? I am a great believer in taking a closer look into your own back yard and fixing the problems before pointing fingers, attacking and blaming others. One of the Muslims on the link above made the statement "u need to know ur faith there is no such thing as an extremist Muslim u believe or u don't." First this person is entitled to believe as they wish but this person is so very wrong in my opinion. Al-Qaeda has proven Muslim extremists exist and they have not been defending themselves, they have been attacking. Just ask Malala Yousafzi, a young activist, shot by the Taliban for speaking out and working for equality and education for young girls and women in Pakistan.


Christians will articulate (some in my own family will say this and not give Muslims the same respect ) that groups such as the Klu Klux Klan, Hutaree, The Convenant, The Sword, and the Arm of the Lord, Defensive Action, The Freemen Community, Lambs of Christ (and the list goes on) are not true Christians yet all these groups foundations are formed out of Christianity.

The truth (in my world) is that any religion when practiced the right way is peaceful and loving and accepting of other religions and respects the people who practice other religions even if it is not their own. When I took my Shahada my friends husband (a very kind Egyptian man) said we are to respect other people and their religions. We don't believe in their religion but respect their decision to practice it whether we think it is right or wrong. What he said was a no brainer for me since I already believed that as a Christian/spiritual believer before I converted.

The kind teachings from other Muslims is what I soak up and the love and respect I was taught growing up has been apart of my very foundation for what I live by today. My grandfather is a retired pastor and I grew up in a family of devout Christians who went to church every Sunday and sometimes on Wednesdays and then there was vacation bible school and "Confirmation" classes (much like Catholic Catechism). My very foundation and love and respect for religion and other religion comes from Christianity and how I was raised so all this hate and fear and disrespect for other people and religions is unacceptable to me. So when I see Muslims spread the same hateful beliefs as Christians and other religions (yes Christianity and Muslims are not the only ones to do this) I am not surprised but it is soooooooooooooooooo disheartening and mind blowing.

How is any peace to be reached with all this hate from all sides. Politics and the media just adds fuel to the fire to issues that have been alive for thousands of years. Ugh...

At the end of the day we can only hope to reach one (maybe) or two at a time with patience and love and prayer. Lots and lots of prayer just as I learned growing up.

By the way, this goes for hateful Atheists that spew hate as well....they will deny it just the same as Christians and Muslims and Hindu's and Jews (again the list goes on) but alas, hate is hate is hate is hate no matter how you slice and dice it. My father is Atheist, but he is so laid back and peaceful and one of the very reasons I believe in love and respect as I do. He is so accepting of me and my decisions and that is what touches my heart, his un-denying love. Everyone should have a daddy like I do. Everyone should have the family that I do. Although some of my family do not support me or understand they love me regardless and that is what is important.  

Todays Muslim Experience

Today's Muslim experience: Walking into TJMax as two young ladies walked behind me and past me to enter a different store.

As they (two 14-16 year old's) walked past me I heard one of the young ladies say to her friend in her lil hood rat ghetto tone (really to me to get my reaction) "I couldn't wear that Islamic shit, fuck Islam!"

Me: turned around at "I couldn't wear that Islamic shit" and looked at her as she finished her sentence. (Yes she looked me straight in the eye back) I curled my lips and smiled then winked at her. We continued to exchange stares as they disappeared out of sight and I continued to smile. All of 30 seconds....

smh...so disappointing that people teach their children to hate what they don't know about. Such is life they can keep that hate with them. :)

On a high note, when I went into the dollar store I was picking out some sugar and a young boy about 12 years old walked in front of me and said "excuse me mam" and my jaw just about hit the floor....from 0 to 60 just a short half hour. I young boy used his manners and smiled. Now the parent of that kid are raising him right. I told the cashier when I was checking out and she said he is always in the dollar store buying his mom and grandma something small but nice. Today he bought them snow globes. She said he is the sweetest kid. Amazing!

Struggles

Struggles come and go with me and Islam. Right now I do not pray as I should. No excuse just lazy but I am very aware of it and everyday I push myself. I dove head first into being all I could be as a Muslim and have found it still overwhelming. It is a complete change from what I once was. Its not a bad thing, just different.

I am still having a great experience working in Ann Arbor. If anyone doesn't like Muslims I wouldn't know it. I am always complimented on my scarves which some Muslims would say is haram to get a compliment because it means its drawing attention. My opinion on the matter is that being a hijabi and Muslim draws attention regardless of what I am wearing because what I am wearing makes me stand out.

I have found myself in debates with other Muslims but have discovered as with Christianity there are evangelicals, fundamentalists and of course extremists as well. Debating is a waste of time and I have deleted a few fb pages from my list. Maybe some have good intentions but at this point it is to over whelming and the messages are too inconsistent and I must chose whom I get my information from. I have a few people I keep close and haven't been to a Mosque yet. I have never been one to conform to another person or groups thought process and it holds true for Islam as well. I will study and read and come to my own conclusions on the lessons.

Most recently was the talk on the "camel hump" with all the quoting and the interpretations of the quotes I came to the conslusion that it is all up to intentions and that Allah will know at the end of our days.

I have found Ann Arbor has a large Muslim community and it is inspiring when I am greeted by another Muslim. It pushes me to get my books out to learn more Arabic. I have a website I can go to on my phone

My son and his work.

So not to long ago my son said one of the guys he works with made the following comment in regards to me being Muslim.

"she better not order any food from my station" and he and my son got into a verbal argument that ended nose to nose before it was broke up.

I went back into his work today to take him a few things and when I was there I was greeted by a waitress who took me back to see him. She introduced herself and was all smiles. A few minutes ago I received a text from my son which said a few waitresses saw me and thought I was his sister (My looking young enough to be his sister has haunted him since he was young lol but I love it) and thought it was cool his mom was Muslim. I know that made him feel good. Mash'Allah for every bad reaction there are four good reactions.

A new job

Well, I was hired at a Costco Warehouse a couple weeks ago and I am happy to have a job. It is not full time so I am afraid it will not pay my bills nor is it going to help me pay for a place to live. But starting over isn't easy.

However, last night a customer made my whole day and this is what happened.

So last night at work I was filling in at the door marking off reciepts as customers left and an older man in his 70's walks up to me and our conversation was as follows:

Man: "Are you Muslim?"

Me: "yes sir."
...

Man: "Well I will make you a deal, you pray for me and I will pray for you."

Me: "Deal"

Man: "Peace be upon you"

Me: "Walaykum Salam"

That totally made my day!

 

 

 

 

It is experiences like this that totally dispell the perception Muslims outside of the United States have let alone the ones that have a horrible experience living here. The majority of my experiences have been wonderful.

New job

Things are looking up. I got the confirmation call from Costco. I am officially an employee and I have my orientation this next weak. Yay....its a start! Its something different. Its not my what I am interested in as far as a career but it will be something to pay my bills for a while. I found that cashiering at Barnes and Noble isn't exactly interesting.

After two weeks I'm board but it is such a positive thing to have a job and I look forward to getting my own place once again. I can't wait.

Friday at work at Barnes and Noble

On Friday the 7th at Barnes and Noble I was cashiering when an elderly man walked up and said you must be really cold today. I replied no, I wear this every day no matter how hot or cold it is. He huffed and puffed. Snatched his money and walked off. He didn't reply back when I told him to have a nice day.

In saying that, when he said that to me I really wasn't paying attention to what he really meant by it. When I replied to him it was truly just reply to what I thought was an honest harmless comment by him. It wasn't until he huffed and puffed and snatched his money that I became suspicious of his intent and had the feeling he was being mean with a nasty attitude. It was nice outside, it was a warm day.

I relayed the incident to my two co-workers and they said he was being mean. I don't know, I didn't see his face when he said it and I really didn't make eye contact with him at all. He only bought a juice so the transaction was less than 45 seconds.

My heart says to not make anything more of it and not read into it if I am not sure. I don't like to think the worst of people even when my gut is confused.

Job

A while ago I struggled with whether to wear a hijab to job interviews but in the end I decided to wear my hijab and keep true to myself. Yesterday, I was given a conditional job offer pending a drug test, (I passed that) and a criminal history check. Insha' Allah they call me and confirm my orientation by the end of this week..

It is a bit far but Masha'allah I have good friends that will allow me to stay with them. I truly hope to move down that way very soon.

I have found throughout my journey (which is still very new to me) that most people are accepting and supportive. When I announced my hesitation to wear my hijab to a job interview it was my non-Muslim friends that encouraged me to wear my hijab and said it doesn't or shouldn't matter and to stay true to myself and my religion. Masha'Allah people are wonderful.

American Muslimah, what does that mean to me? At 44 years of age and having just converted I find that I am deep into my American culture. I know that in Islam women reach paradise easier with a husband but I am not married. Islam also says Muslim women must marry a Muslim man. I am not in love with a Muslim man. At 44 I will not be having any more children and I have discovered I do not need a man for anything. I am self-sufficeint and fiercely independant and that will not change. If I was in love with a Christian man before I decided to convert that would not change either. I was once Christian and married to a Muslim man so I know it can work out. (we did not split due to religious differences)

These things pass through my mind often. As I want to be a good Muslim woman but my independance and my own personal belief systems. As a woman that is a survivor of domestic violence.

Today’s Muslim Experience:

In light of all the scary hate crimes happening to people of different races, religions and sexual orientations, with all the bullying that happens causing so many to take their own lives making this world such an ugly place to live there comes a light from someone that brightens ones day.

I usually get questions from people such as, “do you wear that scarf because your husband makes you?” “Do you wear that because of your religion?” “Are you Muslim?” or “Oh, I love your scarf that is beautiful.”
...

When I see another Muslim we greet each other with As’Salamu ‘Alaikum or Salam. When I am in public I usually initiate the greeting with non-muslims wearing a huge smile and saying Hi, how are you today?

However, today was different while I was partaking in the great Kroger shopping experience minding my own business looking for some decaf tea (yup coffee and broke up and we are not getting back together). That is when I heard a very bold and intentional “Asalamu ‘Alaikum” as I looked up to see a young lady (about 18 or maybe 20) standing next to me with a smile on her face I replied “Wa ‘Alaikum Salam” with a huge grin on my face.

We ran across each other in a few more isles and even in check out. She was a very happy social young lady that has been the first non-Muslim to greet me with a Muslim greeting with such zest and love and acceptance outside of my friends and family.

Amazing how something so random and unexpected can make ones day and take away, even for the briefest of moments, the ugliness of the world we live in.

People never cease to amaze me in a good way

I live in an area with very few muslims and quite frankly I have not seen but a few here and there. The most I saw in one day was about four at a childrens even in Flint about three weeks ago and I was amazed. I thought I was alone up in these parts.

My perception of non-muslims is that they are against Islam and really know nothing about Islam. My experience online is different then seeing people in person.

Online: Experience on youtube alone is amazingly harsh. Many Atheists, Christians and racist bigots are finding courage from behind the keyboards and their attacks are calculating, malicous and horrifying. To think these people interact with the rest of society outside of the computer is terrifying and the actions of people like Wade Micheal Page who recently shot and killed 6 people at a Sikh Temple in Wisconsin. Belonging to a white supremiscist group and was discharged from the military for "patterns of misconduct" is all to common.

It really makes one question the good in people and lose faith in humanity and the good in people. Then it happens every now and then, someone says something that totally dispells the notion that all people are against or hate Islam.

As my sister and I shopped at Khols I let out a few huge yawns that grabbed the attention of a woman about 65 or older. She said you can't be yawning right now don't you have to go home and make dinner. I assumed she was talking about Ramadan and I replied, no I can't participate in Ramadan this year so we already ate. She laughed and said no I just meant dinner but isn't Ramadan kind of like our Lent? I said it is very similiar.

I just love it when people surprise me with an open mind and knowledge. So wonderful and makes me feel happy that people recognize what I already know. I struggle with understanding some of the teaching of the Qur'an but I did also with the Bible so it is no different. It doesn't mean I don't want to be Muslim, but it means I have to find the answer within.